The Trend Report™: Happy Honda Days
A look at the capitalist, secularist, meme-able, and highly American expression of seasonal goodwill.
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oop!!! Cuomo bringing everyone down.
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"They've come up with a new buzzword"
“polywork”? lol gtfo
For the past six years, I’ve done this really dumb thing where I take photos of myself with Hondas from December 1 until December 25.
The reason behind this is multi-tiered: I had been saying “Happy Honda Days” for years during the holidays, which evolved into writing about the environmental impact of seemingly benign vehicles and showing off all the cute outfits I wore while catching the bus or walking or biking, all to capture the consumer-secular abyss that is Christmas in America, a place where language has become an act of war. Nothing captures the true spirit of America like forgoing goodwill and charity for corporate oil monsters intended to run over the baby Jesus. Barbara Kruger weeps.
Around this time of year, I get messages from friends, followers, and total strangers asking what’s up with the Hondas. The above is why – but also know that I’m not alone in this expression. The “Happy Honda Days” phrase, idea, and general holidays-via-cars seems to capture a collective white flag that these times mean nothing if not to shop, that brands have hijacked everything good in this world, and that we only exist to be squeezed of our money. Cars, as bad as they are, have long been tied to the American spirit, which ties back to sales language dating back to World War II. In the past decade, cars have become an easy target as these brands nationally push for you to buy, buy, buy a car with a bow when you barely have any money. In 2015, this all came to a head with Christine Sydelko’s iconic “Merry Chrysler” Vine which captured corporate holiday mania, quickly becoming a holiday expression. Slogans like Lexus’ “December to remember” get similar mileage as does “the sales event of the year,” another turn of phrase.
“Happy Honda Days” cuts deepest, the best homonym for holiday language serves up the best-worst anti-Christmas, pro-capitalist sentiment. This has become a huge joke on Twitter, colliding with the “hon n d a car” meme, because of the absurdity that it captures, a manifestation of our mass brain defects from living under capitalism. We don’t want Hondas! We just want to be able to live and not have to work or worry about money on a planet with breathable air and non-chaotic climate but, nope, here we are in the end times, making content, trying to look the other way as we all slowly die.
Sigh. Happy Honda Days. It’s the only reason for the season.
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“am i a sza fan?”
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"here is my 2022 trend forecast"
This is killing me.
"whenever i meet a gay couple"
This is just very accurate.
"best video i’ve seen all year”
"north west has a tiktok page and the comments"
HELP US NORTH HELP US
"nothing has ever made me want to buy a cologne"
Love that not-gay cologne guy.
"love germany...but we gotta keep keeping an eye on these guys"
This is funny, yes, only made funnier that they’re playing Darude’s “Sandstorm.”
"ad in norway where santa is gay”
Meet your gay Santa, kids!
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Tis the season!!!!!! Merry Chrysler and Happy Honda Days to all who celebrate! Also: today is the 25th anniversary of this holiday happening.
And, finally, a look at my future Wiki.
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